Monthly Archive for January, 2007

The Paper Chase (2)

written by Stan Still from You're nicked!

Clearly some of you need to get out a lot more, as you have asked to find out more about the sort of paperwork that we are forced to do, either by statutory requirement or the whim of a senior officer. Don't blame me if you nod off half way through. I'll try and keep it as brief as possible.


Crime Recording.

Crime Report - four page booklet.

Suspect report - where a named or identifiable suspect is discovered. One page.

Additional property report - when so much stuff has been nicked/damaged that one sheet just won't do.

Investigation report - this is when the paper really starts to get chased. Every crime report has to have an investigation report. This is a double sided A4 sheet that acts as a record of every line of inquiry or any useful information in relation to the crime report. That's the theory anyway. Some officers are better at it than others. The way our crime recording system works is that every time something happens to a crime, an investigation report should be completed and faxed off to be stored as an image on our document management system. This means that, in theory, a double sided piece of paper is used every time an officer knocks on a door and gets no answer.

The idea of the document management system is to make our crime recording process a paperless system. What it actually does is increase the consumption of paper by approximately 500%. When the original report is completed, it gets sent to the Crime Desk for filing. This means that the investigating officer has to print off a copy of the report from the document management system. With protracted investigations, or where reports are transferred to other officers, this report can be printed off several times. Go figure!

Detection report - every now and then, someone detects a crime, either by charging a suspect or cautioning them or by some other means. PC Bloggs has produced a post giving more information on this topic. Go there for a break and then come back for more! The thing about the detection report is that all the information that is written on the form has probably been input into the custody computer system, so you would think that the custody system would tell the crime system that the crime had been detected, wouldn't you? No - that would be far too simple and would mean that less paper would be used. I'll tell you more about the custody system later.

Vulnerable victims report - Imagine if you will a domestic incident, where one member of a family makes an allegation that another member of the family has done something to hurt or upset them. This makes the person reporting a vulnerable victim and creates the need for this report. The VVR (I just made that abbreviation up - it's actually given a different name in out force) asks the same information as the crime report, plus a few extra bits. There isn't an option for leaving a box blank and saying "refer to crime report", so the data has to be entered twice. There is also a VVR Investigation log, which works in exactly the same way as the crime investigation log, so two forms have to be filled out containing basically the same information. The reason is that the VVR shouldn't be scanned to the document management system, so in order to make sure that someone can follow the investigation, two logs have to be done. Of course, they are two completely different forms, so it isn't possible to use one and photocopy it for the other report!

On the subject of investigation reports, for certain offences a specific report template must be filled out. So if we record a burglary, theft of/from vehicle, theft of mobile phone or other crime that is currently flavour of the month, a separate report has to be completed. If an officer is ever tasked with taking a report of robbery, the sound of heart sinking can be heard over the Airwaves. This is because the Robbery Booklet needs to be completed. This is an umpteen page booklet, that contains similar information to the crime report, but the data has to be entered separately. Once the booklet is completed, a Robbery investigation report also has to be submitted.

And so it goes on.


The original post can be found http://yornicked.blogspot.com/2007/01/paper-chase-2.html

Lost in Translation

written by Robert 'Bob' Slot from Bobby Slot

People seek Inspiration in different ways. A colleague of mine likes to print off words of wisdom by various intellectuals and post them up on the wall in his office as a shrine to all things clever.

I think he thinks it makes him look bright, but I doubt he understands any of them. (He certainly doesn't practice their teachings, but that's another story)

Anyway, not one to be outdone, I decided it was time that one of mine went up on the wall of wisdom.

However, what I wanted to post 'Don't let the Bastards Get you down!" is hardly acceptable on a police station wall.

So, being the lateral thinking, 'out of the box, blue sky' type of guy I am, I concoct a cunning plan.

If I were to translate my saying into Russian, who'll know? Ha Ha, it can be my little joke, won't I just be the funniest cop in my chair!

So off I trot to trusty babelfish to translate my text, it works a treat..

Не препятствуйте сволочам получить вас вниз

'Great' thinks I, rubbing my hands together and giggling like a schoolgirl on laughing gas.

Better just translate it back, just to check...


Do not prevent bastards to obtain you downward

Hmm...

Not sure which makes more sense!

It's going on the wall anyway!



© Bob Slot 2007


The original post can be found http://bobbyslot.blogspot.com/2007/01/inspiration.html

The Paper Chase

written by Stan Still from You're nicked!

Last week, I started a post trying to describe how much paper is used in the administration of even the most basic of policing jobs.

By the time I'd reached the ninth paragraph, I was bored and I guessed that anyone who attempted to read the post would also have been very, very bored and would not have come back to my blog ever again.

So I binned it.

However, in the interests of openness, I pass it over to my readers to decide if they really want to know how many forms are required to process a simple shoplifter or record a minor assault.

Let me know and I'll try and knock out a very brief summary.

The original post can be found http://yornicked.blogspot.com/2007/01/paper-chase.html

General is on holiday.

written by The general from Intelligence Detective.

Me and Mrs General are on holiday.

I am blogging from a far off land.

Amazing eh?

Don't worry, I am keeping up the British front, drinking beers in the sun and generally relaxing on your behalf.

The original post can be found http://intelligence-detective.blogspot.com/2007/01/general-is-on-holiday.html

Diversity Matters 1

written by Bitseach from Another bloody grumpy copper

Another day, another diversity matter. This time the tabloids round upon, for once, NOT a Muslim officer or PCSO, but a Jewish one! See? They can be fair and impartial too! Hurrah!

Reported in The Soaraway Current Bun (where else?) was an article describing how an Orthodox Jewish police recruit has been given Friday afternoons off as it's the Jewish Sabbath (if it's not deemed too damaging or demeaning to call them "recruits" these days - it's probably something soft and fluffy like "trainee officer", "student officer", "constable in training", "student", "person who happens to be learning policing and the law but no bloody discipline or anything that might be considered disciplined, uniform or militaristic" or something like that)(we are also not encouraged to call them "squibs", "bloody probationers" or "gobby probbies" either [Boo!]).

Some people have been disparaging about this but "Splendid!", say I!

The Anglican church is the official religion of the UK (like it or not) and observes many of the rites of the Roman Church. As such, these include Holy Days of Obligation and there are [excuse the pun] MASSES of them! Including most Sundays! Far be it for me to go against the precepts of the Vatican and the edifice of the Anglican Communion and NOT go to Church on Sundays now, even the Sundays I work, and of these there are many. I shall ensure I am shriven on Shrove Tuesday and receive the ashes on Ash Wednesday, all with a happy smile and jaunty step!

Of course nobody knows quite how orthodox this reportedly Orthodox Jew is - my Jewish friends, though at the time of writing this is unconfirmed, inform me that in Israel there is universal National Service for men and women, except the Orthodox community, and that this is due to issues such as the one above - there are too many rules of the Talmud and particularly around "Shabbat" that it would be impractical to have Hassidic and similar communities in the armed forces. They are therefore exempt. [here, I have to pause and consider my sources - word of mouth from people who are very "right-on" and as a result, have no support for anything they consider to be in any way fundamentalist - but these are my friends! I am open to correction and education on any points that are inaccurate or misleading]

There is not necessarily a parallel to the policing situation here, but there may be.

If one's faith - any faith - precludes one's ability to do a 24hours a day job like policing, is one in the right job? Can we be "of faith" and still police effectively and without being a burden to our colleagues?

Incidentally, looking up some references on-line to illustrate today's 'blog, I came upon some horrendously anti-Semitic sites, especially some US ones. This certainly highlights the need for diversity but surely, SURELY there is some common, central ground: not being fascists with minorities but not being unrealistically and impractically accommodating either? These questions and issues, I suspect, will run and run......

The original post can be found http://anotherbloodygrumpycopper.blogspot.com/2007/01/diversity-matters-1.html

Police on Speed

written by ExtraSpecialCopper from Ex-Confessions of a SPC

I have already looked at taxi drivers, mobile phone users and those who dont wear seatbelts and not forgetting speed cameras!


What about all the stories we hear about how naughty the police are as we speed all the time. Sometimes without the blue lights and sirens.

Just to clear up to members of the public who may be unaware.

Section 87 Road Traffic Regulations Act 1984 exempts certain emergency vehicles from speed limits if observance would hinder the use of the vehicle for the purpose it was being used for on that occasion.

Basically, if sticking to the speed limits would hinder the emergency/incident, then the police (and other services outlined in Section 87) then they can speed.

This means that
  • Blue lights do not have to be used
  • Sirens do not have to be used
  • If a police car is speeding and doesnt have blue lights and sirens going, doesnt always mean that they are just speeding for the hell of it (obviously sometimes it does)
  • If a police car wacks its lights on overtakes you turns them off and bombs it off, they are not always late for the Kebab house run, they may be going somewhere urgently but dont want to give the fact away to who they are looking for.
Obviously, this leads to many problems.

1) The moaning member of public. This is the sort of person who goes out of their way to find a non story, and blow it out of proportion. Such stories include the caller complaining that the police car went through a red light "too fast" or just the fact that they did it, that they were not wearing a seat belt at the same time as having the person in the back of the car jumping all over the place (kicking off).
This sort of thing is something that happens quite often. This is one of the latest stories.

You might even get the odd disalusioned person saying things such as

"Speed cameras, and the way speed is being enforced, are criminalising everybody, but the police's own people are let off"

Nigel Humphries of the Association of British Drivers. Lets see what he says when his house is being burgled with him being threatened with a knife or a gun and to have the police stuck in traffic, or making at the speed limit from 20 miles away.

2) The more serious stories crop up from time to time which involve police vehicle accidents.
Apparently, according to the good old Home Office anyway, 126 people died as a result of an accident involving a police vehicle between 2000 and 2004.

Everytime a police officer gets into a car, they could be open to being charged with driving without due care and attention or even dangerous driving should something happen. Examples of this can be found here here and there are many times when a crash happens which injures or kills an officer.
Not forgetting cases such as PC Milton - these dont help in what the public think of police driving!

What should be done about it though??
How many times on an average shift do officers go to a grade one (blue light job). Many thousand times a day across the country. How many of these result in an accident?

What would happen if there was no exemption? People would critisise the police for taking too long to get somewhere, for not doing enough.

This just relates back to my good old theory of damned if we do, damned if we dont.

The original post can be found http://extraspecialpc.blogspot.com/2007/01/police-on-speed.html

Big Brother – Shilpa – Jade

written by The Special Constable's Blog from The Special Constable's Blog

Big Brother:
I hate the Big Brother program with a passion. The show organizers purposely pick personalities that will clash in so called social experiments. Their sole intent is to gain higher viewing figures. No person who watches this should be surprised that an incident happens (naturally or staged). This time though, something happened that the organisers didn't expect. An international incident. Their own capitalist greed has clouded their judgement and they gave an international platform to a bunch of 1 celled Amoebas. The whole world saw the remarks which I believe were racist. At the time Shilpa believed they were but did not want to make a scene and revolked them. She was magnanemous. It didn't suprise me that the last 3 people left in the house were 1) not English 2) were educated and 3) were more down-to-earth then their English counterparts. I was ashamed of being British watching snippits of this and being force fed it in the media. Soldiers fighting in Iraq is much more bloody important!!!! STOP MAKING THE NEWS AND THEN REPORTING IT!!!! Sometimes I think the media have too much control and have lost their way.
 
Shilpa:
A quite amazing woman. Very well educated, beautiful and dignified. I look up to her as a model of restraint and forgiveness.
 
Jade:
I would so much like to rant about her but like good old mum's advice "If you don't have anything nice to say. don't say it". Lets just hope we don't see any more of her..

The original post can be found http://specialcopper.spaces.live.com/Blog/cns!4FA2EC81CA2C804B!247.entry

Big Brother – Shilpa – Jade

written by The Special Constable's Blog from The Special Constable's Blog

Big Brother:
I hate the Big Brother program with a passion. The show organizers purposely pick personalities that will clash in so called social experiments. Their sole intent is to gain higher viewing figures. No person who watches this should be surprised that an incident happens (naturally or staged). This time though, something happened that the organisers didn't expect. An international incident. Their own capitalist greed has clouded their judgement and they gave an international platform to a bunch of 1 celled Amoebas. The whole world saw the remarks which I believe were racist. At the time Shilpa believed they were but did not want to make a scene and revolked them. She was magnanemous. It didn't suprise me that the last 3 people left in the house were 1) not English 2) were educated and 3) were more down-to-earth then their English counterparts. I was ashamed of being British watching snippits of this and being force fed it in the media. Soldiers fighting in Iraq is much more bloody important!!!! STOP MAKING THE NEWS AND THEN REPORTING IT!!!! Sometimes I think the media have too much control and have lost their way.
 
Shilpa:
A quite amazing woman. Very well educated, beautiful and dignified. I look up to her as a model of restraint and forgiveness.
 
Jade:
I would so much like to rant about her but like good old mum's advice "If you don't have anything nice to say. don't say it". Lets just hope we don't see any more of her..

The original post can be found http://SpecialCopper.spaces.live.com/Blog/cns!4FA2EC81CA2C804B!247.entry

This Week

written by ExtraSpecialCopper from Ex-Confessions of a SPC

Following my last few posts on Prisons, this week I shall focus on "traffic laws" and stories to do with traffic.

As for my previous theme, let me know what you think to this idea below!

Theme Weeks
Yes! Great Idea!
Nah, its rubbish
Themes? I didnt notice
Bovverrrred?

The original post can be found http://extraspecialpc.blogspot.com/2007/01/this-week.html

Latest update

written by Squadron Leader from The Chicken Run

Hi folks,

Thanks for missing me.... Sorry for the delay, but I have had a lot of things to get on with that have kept me from the blog. As a new (ish) bobby, I have to do attachments with various units around my force. That's where I've been.

And it gets better. I am going away next week for a week's skiing in Bavaria.

http://www.oberstdorf.de/index.shtml?homepage

So long as there's snow, I'll be ok. If not, I'll be sampling one or two steins of lager. I might even try doing some remote blogging!!

The original post can be found http://the-chicken-run.blogspot.com/2007/01/latest-update.html