Monthly Archive for April, 2007

Look who’s looking

written by Stan Still from You're nicked!

Like a lot of bloggers, I've got some code on my site that tells me who has been looking. It only tells me the ISP, not your name and address, so don't worry too much.

Some large organisations are able to provide their own internet service, so they are easier to recognise, so it was a pleasant surprise to note that the powers that be are taking an interest in what some of us are saying.

Whether they will actually do anything useful in response remains to be seen.

So by now you are wondering who it is that is looking at this site - if you are a typical nosey copper, you will have already looked at the image, which is a copy from my stats site. PC Bloggs should also take note!


The original post can be found http://yornicked.blogspot.com/2007/04/look-whos-looking.html

Call me – and pay up!

written by Bitseach from Another bloody grumpy copper

Now being a foolish old wooden-top and not at the exalted heights of shiny-bummed TDC or anything (!), what do I know about the law?
But I DO watch television.
Not generally rubbish day-time quiz shows admittedly, but I do watch telly. So when I read, and keep reading about TV companies ripping off members of the public, by getting the fools to call in to competition 'phone lines which have already closed, wickle alarm bells start ringing. If the stories are true, these companies are deliberately misleading the public (that their silly competitions are still running and that a winner hasn't yet been picked) and whilst doing so, gaining money for themselves (/the company). Now I'm no great expert on company liabilities and overlaps with the Trades Description Act, Ofcom, ICSTIS or anything like that, but aren't they committing a Fraud?
Look - under the Fraud Act 2006, "(1) A person is guilty of fraud if he is in breach of any of the sections listed in subsection (2)....
(2) Fraud by False Representation:
1. A person is in breach of this section if he:
(a) dishonestly makes a false representation, and
(b) intends, by making the representation—
(i) to make a gain for himself or another, or
(ii) to cause loss to another or to expose another to a risk of loss.
A representation is false if—
(a) it is untrue or misleading, and
(b) the person making it knows that it is, or might be, untrue or misleading.
Now, as I say, I am but a mere woodentop, but doesn't it look like these guys in the TV companies are breaking the new law? I expect questions to be asked in the House.

The original post can be found http://anotherbloodygrumpycopper.blogspot.com/2007/04/call-me-and-pay-up.html

Is it really necessary?

written by Stan Still from You're nicked!

Hi folks - remember me?

The good weather has had me out in the garden, rather than stuck in front of the computer. I do enough of that at work, as do most police officers these days. It beats getting wet, getting complained at or getting flat feet though.

I've also been revising for the forthcoming Part 2 of the Inspector's promotion exam. I've had enough of filling out claims for overtime and being paid to work on bank holidays and promotion is the best way out of it.

Anyway - back to the title of this post.

Those of you in the job will know that the law changed last year, giving police the power to arrest for virtually any offence, providing that the arresting officer could satisfy him or herself that the arrest was necessary for one or more of a number of reasons. The most commonly used part of the necessity test is to allow for the "prompt and effective investigation of the offence or behaviour of the suspect.

There is apparently a new necessity test. You won't find it in the statute books, but it must exist because it is being used all the time. The unwritten necessity test allows officers to arrest people "where it is necessary to get my performance figures up for this month".

How does this work? Imagine you have been given a crime report for a poxy damage. Due to your workload, this report has been prioritised down to the bottom of your list and is now covered in cobwebs. It keeps popping up for air and you know you've got to do something with it, because it is on the crime system and cannot be deleted (short of taking a large axe to a server or two). This crime report is now five months old and your sergeant is advising you to take some action.

You know who the suspect is. You know where they live. You know that they are going to deny it and there is no independent evidence to counter the suspect's anticipated account, so you know that the chances of getting the report detected are slim to none. So how do you get rid of this report?

Common sense says you go round to the suspect's house, caution them, ask them if they did it, warn them about their language when they reply "F*** off, of course I didn't", then go back to the nick and file the report as undetected.

Performance culture requires you to arrest the suspect, take them to custody, wait for their brief to arrive, have consultation, write out a prepared statement (or rehearse the order of the words "comment" and "no" to ensure that they get it right in the interview) and then go in for a five minute interview. Hopefully, you will have a custody officer with the nouse and backbone to NFA the report, otherwise you have to go through the charade of obtaining CPS advice. The ultimate outcome? The report is filed as undetected, but you have scored one more in the "Arrests this month" column and you have wasted four hours in custody for a no hope job.

The only reason for the arrest is to get an statistic on the sheet. It wasn't necessary, yet up and down the country, these sort of arrests are taking place all the time. Juveniles are being put into the system for a playground spat, because officers are claiming it is "necessary" to arrest them for a minor assault, even though no-one wants to make a complaint, but a crime report has been generated and the pressure is on to get it sorted.

One of these days - and I hope it is soon - someone somewhere is going to challenge the necessity of an arrest. I hope they win. The outcome will be that a new Powerpoint presentation will have to be put together to show officers how it should be done. Never mind a proper training session - that should have been done before the law came into effect but forces couldn't be arsed, so there's no point doing it now.

The necessity test is being abused in order to satisfy the demands of performance management. It isn't providing a better service to the public, in fact it is alienating and criminalising more and more people.

Can we please go back to the old days, where we used to interview some people in our pocket books and report them for summons? It makes life so much easier for the officer on the street and gives them more time to do what they are paid to do - persecute motorists.

I'm back!!

The original post can be found http://yornicked.blogspot.com/2007/04/is-it-really-necessary.html

(Insert Orwellian Reference Here)

written by theplasticcopper from Plastic Copper

Thought PoliceThe Stephen Lawrence enquiry has had a profound effect on the police service, and rightly so, but I never expected just how PC one is expected to be to become a PC. We’ve just completed a number of days of pretty intense “diversity” training, and although I realise its vital that as a police officer I do not discriminate, I’m starting to realise what a minefield this could become.

Words and phrases I’ve been using for years are now taboo, their origins rooted in our country’s shameful colonial past. Jokes must be appropriate and not offend anyone, heaven forbid a member of the public overhears a chance muttering while we’re on patrol. Oh, and I can’t “brainstorm” in class any more in case an epileptic in present – a “thought shower” will have to suffice (presumably that isn’t too offensive to those who don’t enjoy washing).

And what happens when we cross this imaginary line? We didn’t have to wait too long to find out. One colleague bust into our classroom crying after being accused of uttering a ‘potentially racist’ remark, following a complaint that had been made. Again, a phase she had used for years in blissful ignorance that it had any such connotation, but she was duly pulled up on the matter and a record make about the incident. But who would be so petty as to complain? My eyes starting darting around at my new colleagues with a sense of suspicion. We’re supposed to stick together yet someone has obviously ratted on this poor girl.

We later discovered it had been a trainer who had heard the remark and complained rather than one of us, but with posters plastered around our training college encouraging everyone to ring the ‘Integrity Line’ if we hear something juicy, it could well be one of my colleagues in the future. Having started the course as one of the more lively characters in the class I’m now making sure that I’m not so vocal now because I’m sure I’ll slip up sooner or later.

 

UPDATE: Since this sorry little episode we’ve had the opportunity to chat to our force’s diversity department, who were of the very sensible opinion that people shouldn’t get caught up in the semantics of such words and phrases because it was completely undermining what the real issues are. We asked them if they could have a little chat with our trainers.

So I have found some sensible people in our force. Only took 5 weeks.

 


The original post can be found http://plasticcopper.wordpress.com/2007/04/21/13/

A law abiding organisation?

written by PCFrankyFact from PC Franky Fact. His views on policing are lacking in tact.

A friend of mine brought this to my attention today.

Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics?

29 have been accused of spouse abuse.

7 have been arrested for fraud.

19 have been accused of writing bad cheques.

117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses.

3 have done time for assault.

71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit.

14 have been arrested on drug-related charges.

8 have been arrested for shoplifting.

21 are currently defendants in lawsuits.

84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year.

Can you guess which organization this is?

It's the 535 members of the Houses of Parliament. The same group that cranks out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line!

No wonder that the system seems to favour the bad guys is it?

The original post can be found http://pcfrankyfact.blogspot.com/2007/04/law-abiding-organisation.html

Wee confession

written by Bitseach from Another bloody grumpy copper

Okay, it's time I came out. I've been blagging it for months now, pretending I was something I'm not; pretending I knew things I clearly didn't. I've tried looking it up, researching in the background so that I wasn't embarrassed talking "professionally" about things about which I knew - exactly - nip.

So exactly what the hell are the "basket of 10" crimes from the British Crime Survey? I spent hours online the other day trying to find this out. I looked up the obvious - looked at the MPS's, Counties' and Home Office's web-sites and all to no avail. I've Googled the obvious links and am now. Totally. Frustrated.

Answers crayoned in a pocket-book please at the address below (Comments).
PC "Frustrated" Bitseach.

The original post can be found http://anotherbloodygrumpycopper.blogspot.com/2007/04/wee-confession.html

The World Ended and No-one Noticed

written by unlikely cop from Unlikely Cop

Anyway, after the overwhelming generosity of the last post, back to things more rant-worthy.

There are stats out to say that as a country we are taking more sick days. Does anyone else out there find this surprising? Not me!

I remember being bright-eyed and willing. Unstoppable even. And not that long ago. But not any more.

I have always prided myself, whatever the illness, on working to the bitter end and only wimps went home to be poorly. This was nothing special and others were just as stubborn. It comes from a sense of pride and maybe a little guilt in not letting the team down.

I had an operation only a few years ago (and relevant to my previously mentioned tormentor, no, I wasn’t shot). It kept me off the streets for a few months. Later I had a bit of a scrap, which meant another few months off the streets.

On both occasions I was fighting to get back to work. I spent time on each occasion behind a desk at the first opportunity. The first recovery period I was allowed a certain amount of free will and interviewed the odd suspect, took statements and filled a few forms etc. Generally was as useful as a non-combatant could be. I was allowed to judge what jobs I could do etc.

By the time of the second stint in dry-dock the Injury Lawyers had taken over. No taking fingerprints, photos, interviews. I got bollocked for going out in an un-marked car and taking a statement from a victim. Why? Not because I had taken the car… I had permission for that. No, I got it in the neck because I had met with a member of the public and might have had a confrontation. This was a victim remember. She wanted me to be there. It was even the sort of house that I could have a cup of tea and how rare are they???

A bit of time passed and I got the flu. Not a huge dose but enough that I was definitely not firing on all four cylinders. Worn out just before rest days I was seen to be too long in one place at the end of the day and berated for not pulling my weight.

Low morale evident after years of constant change resulting in huge increases in bureaucracy with a relevant decrease in discretion, the willingness of those in charge to hang us out to dry if a mistake is made, the constant covering of arses and a lack of corporate backbone. And we all are supposed to know everything. Miss something and you get thumped for it, even if you have good reason. Even if you have never heard of the problem before. And we all make mistakes, it’s just what happens.

But the upshot is that too many of us are under-valued and over-worked which means that I don’t want to do the job till I burn out anymore. It is just not worth wearing myself out over. And it used to be.

Anecdotally at least, we are not the only ones. Everyone, especially those employed by the various authorities, seems to be in the same boat. A leaky one with one paddle going round in ever decreasing circles.

Now, if I have flu, I take time off. I don’t like letting the team down but there is no thanks for working until you drop.

That’s what happens when you work in a world where you are only as good as your last mistake

The original post can be found http://unlikelycop.blogspot.com/2007/04/world-ended-and-no-one-noticed.html

Special Offer of the Day

written by unlikely cop from Unlikely Cop

I have to admire the persistence of my “tormentor” in the comments sections of the previous few posts. I would like to thank you for providing Mrs UC and I with significant entertainment.

There is a certain irony in blogging about the inadequacy of a customer’s comments only to be abused with the same inadequacy in the attached comments. Such consistently atrocious spelling when it has been pointed out, especially in this day of office programs with spell-checking is truly remarkable.

In reply I offer the following… if you would like to engage in some sort of dialogue please feel free to use the comments section of this post. If you truly have a point of view, an argument or an observation then post it and I will be more than happy to reply. I sometimes even admit to being wrong. Maybe others would like to have a voice too and we can get some proper exchanges going.

Have a go! We may have some sort of decent conversation or argument. If, as I expect, you are unable to string a two coherent thoughts together without resorting to obscenities then we will call it quits and I will delete this post.

The door is open.

The original post can be found http://unlikelycop.blogspot.com/2007/04/special-offer-of-day.html

Boy, I thought WE were crap!

written by Bitseach from Another bloody grumpy copper

Blimey, the Ministry of Defence and the Royal Navy are starting to make the Home Office and Mr Blair look GOOD!
Ooh, we won't let them publish what happened. No, we WILL. Maybe. I dunno. No, they can bugger orf, get their commissions, retire and THEN make money out of their stories like it's always been done (at least by the ruling classes!).
I got my old Latin mistress to translate a good Army expression that often springs into my mind, usually on some crap "Aid" (is there any other sort?). Unfortunately I then immediately forgot the second part and had to look it up, so apologies if the declension (or whatever) is wrong: "Festinate et exspectate!" (tr: "hurry up and wait!"). From the queue for "operational feeding" (/"poisoning") to deployment. Looks like the military is similarly inept, on recent evidence!
However, the better one for this publishing permission débacle would be "On the bus! Off the bus!". This must, of course, be translated into all languages, for fairness. So Latin - or even pig-Latin - translations welcome so that the Home Office and MOD can adopt their new motto - completely fair to everyone as nobody, from ethnic minority language speakers, to dyslexics, to even moderately well-educated English natives can read Latin these days.
[as I get older I find myself becoming less like Colonel Pickering and MUCH more like Henry Higgins - I used to treat flowergirls as ladies, but now I treat ladies as flowergirls!]
More lions led by donkeys? Now, where was that old Latin Grammar?
[Tee hee!]

The original post can be found http://anotherbloodygrumpycopper.blogspot.com/2007/04/boy-i-thought-we-were-crap.html

No Better Tomorrows

written by unlikely cop from Unlikely Cop

Am I the only one that thinks the police are trying to recruit social workers instead of police officers? I doubt it. Surely not if you are inside the job looking out.

We have lowered the fitness requirements so that anyone who can walk from the car to the briefing room can get in.

It is no longer fashionable to fight with the public and if we should put up against those resisting arrest we are more than likely to be suspended and held to account by reporters in charge of our newspapers who have taken over from the yuppie as the most self-serving of our community. Those for whom a quick buck in the form of a shock headline becomes their moral imperative and to hell with the consequences.

We treat all victims the same regardless of whatever crap job they are reporting and treat all incidents as major crime even when there is little or nothing to investigate. We give the self-important more credence than the modest and the meek will never inherit the earth because we only take notice of those that shout the loudest. After all it doesn’t matter how thick you are, shout loudly and we will come running. Have you got a gripe about us? Then come on in and shout directly at us. We will look to the floor in shame, put our hands over our arses and hope you don’t kick us too hard. After all, we are YOUR police service and we are obliged as YOUR servants to put up with all your whinges, crap attitudes and stupid questions even if you are loud, drunk or flicking the scabs from your lobotomy scars at us.

We are trained not to fight back but to “look good on CCTV” - just to tie another hand behind our backs.

Joe Public want us to walk the streets to make them feel safer and spend hours listening to them complain about the kids next door but to attend in 3 seconds flat if anyone dares to play football in the street.

But you know?... Today is a good day. Today I got to put on the blue lights and drive like a maniac. Today I got to hit a door with a big bit of red painted metal and watch it dissolve into an impressively large number of bits. Today I got to look the Bad Guy in the eye and force him to my will. Today I got to have tea with an older member of my customer base who was, thank God, in one piece and not dead in bed as was feared. Today I got to talk to some kids who did not take the pee. Today I even got to have a bit of lunch….

Tomorrow I will pay for it all in paperwork inspired by someone's 20-20 hindsight but today…

The original post can be found http://unlikelycop.blogspot.com/2007/04/no-better-tomorrows.html